In the face of the coming conflict with Iraq, I had to stop and think whether Faded's bad jokes had a place in this world. Do we need them? Then I realized: now more than ever. I don't know why, it worked for Tom Cruise, right?

Any fat women in the crowd? Haha ... too lazy to raise your flabby ass arms?

Any single men in the crowd? Haha ...using both of your hands right now?

JESUS was homeless; and you know what? He never EVER asked for money! Who ARE these bums today?

Freedom fries! Freedom kiss!

What are you sir? A proctologist? .............................. um, shit.

Haha, when two lesbians go at it it's called DONUT SLAMMING.

Now women: they be all pretty and shit. That make up and shit. They like go into the bathroom with their girlfriends and ..... daaaamn, they be talking shit. What the fuck they be talking about?! MEN GODDAMMIT! Then they got those big ol' shoes and shit, haha, they can't run.

I'm going down like a retard on ice skates.

They're still terrible! Surprised?